I have had two relationship break-ups in my life that rocked me into a state of embarrassing self-pity. When I'm down in the dumps I often take solace in junk food and trashy magazines, so I guess that's how I became so acutely aware of, what I like to call, my celebrity break-up buddies. In 2005 I hit the superstar jackpot as I shared my heartbreak with Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt. Then in 2007 I cried along with Michelle Williams and Heath Ledger.
A year later I settled into a healthy, happy relationship and I no longer had a moving emotional journey to share with a fabulous famous-type.
When Beyonce did that belly rub reveal on the red carpet at the MTV awards I thought, "oh that's nice". Then two days later I found out I was also expecting and suddenly I was back on the Imagination Train, Hollywood-bound, because B and I were kindred spirits. From that moment on I found myself on bump watch. Who would end up being my celebrity baby buddy?
No one really knew when Beyonce's baby was a-comin'. There was a lot of speculation, but I was surprised when Ivy Blue popped out in early January. I thought she had another month to go at least. With Jessica Simpson I had the opposite problem. For about three months leading up to the birth of baby Maxwell I constantly found myself thinking how the heck is she still pregnant? The poor woman started looking like she was going to pop about six months in. She was making it very tricky for me to figure out if she'd be my celeb baby buddy.
Following on from Beyonce, in March Jennifer Garner was the last real A-lister to give birth before a slew of B-graders followed suit. There were a couple of major announcements in reality TV land with Snooki and Kourtney Kardashian both revealing they were up the duff, and speaking of... Hilary Duff had a little boy in March falling about six weeks shy of my due date.
While I was pregnant Tori Spelling also announced she was expecting baby number four, and she'd only just popped out baby number three! I have a real soft spot for Tori Spelling so I was kinda stoked we were both pregnant at the same time. Then I did the maths and realised that pretty much everyone who's had a baby in the last five years has been pregnant at the same time as Tori. Suddenly I didn't feel so special.
My little guy was due on May 10th, so when Peaches Geldof had her little boy in late April I resigned myself to the fact she would be my celebrity baby buddy. What a let down. I was hoping for someone a little more exciting.
Jessica Simpson to the rescue! After what seemed like the world's longest pregnancy she finally giving birth to her little girl on May 1st. I must remember to send her a thank you card for so unselfishly running 10 days over so that I didn't have to settle for Peaches. Jessica may not be a classy Hollywood screen siren, but with my penchant for the E! channel and reality TV, I was pretty happy with the result.
Of course now rumour is rife that J-Simps is pregnant again and that blows my mind! I can't believe my celeb baby buddy is already in the ring for round two, and while I'm more than happy to cheer her on from the sidelines, there's no way I'll be climbing in to join her anytime soon.
I hope I haven't just jinxed myself. I definitely don't want to be on here in a few months time saying "remember how I said there's no way I was going to be preggers at the same time as Jessica Simpson again? Yeah, well, about that..."
Perhaps your little one could have shared a playgroup with Apple, Shiloh, Hank, Suri, Mason, Sparrow or Prince Michael II/Blanket? Who is your celebrity baby buddy? If you're not a weirdo like me and didn't pay attention to star studded baby bumps while you were pregnant, then off you hop to do a quick Google search, but be sure to report back!
- © Fairfax NZ News